Fix You
by alwaysabooknerd
Summary: Clary Morgenstern is an artistic, outcast sophomore at Alicante High. Jace Wayland is Alicante's soccer star and one of the most popular guys at the school. When they meet in a chorus class together, their worlds collide. Is there more to them than meets the eye? Can they help each other face their demons? AU, AH, slightly OOC. Rated T for cursing & mature content.
1. Chapter 1

**Fix You~**

_**Hey**____**everyone! So I'm really excited- this is my new fanfic, I hope you like it! I think it's much better written than my other ones, and think you guys will really enjoy it. It's a Clace mostly, with other TMI ships thrown in. The TMI gang in high school- overused, I know, but this one will definitely be unique. Rated M for language & mature content. **_

_**AU, AH, OOC**_

_**A/N: Clary, Isabelle, Simon, Kaelie, and Meliorn are sophomores, and Jace, Alec, Magnus, Sebastian, Jonathon, Jordan, Maia, Raphael, Kaelie, and Seelie are juniors.**_

**.o.O.o.**

**Chapter 1: Cursing Coach Franklin's Hemorrhoid **

_(First day of Clary's sophomore year in High School)_

**Clary's POV**

"CLARYYY WE HAVE TO LEAVE OR WE'LL BE LATE!"

Clary shouted back at her brother. "I'M COMING!"

She grabbed her backpack off the couch, careful not to wake her passed-out dad, and ran out the door behind Jonathon.

"Jon, what time did Dad get back last night?" she asked, timidly.

"I don't know… I think it was past midnight, though." He said, warily.

Clary just nodded, looking out the window as they drove to school.

"Did you sleep okay last night? You've gotta be well rested for your first day of sophomore year, you know." Jon asked, with a smirk.

"Yeah, I slept fine." I lied. I'd had more nightmares last night, all about the same thing, but I didn't want to worry Jonathon with my problems. He probably had a lot on his mind, and I knew I could handle my problems alone.

"Here we are!" He said, grinning as we pulled into the familiar high school parking lot. A sign with the words "Alicante High" loomed in front of them. Ugh.

"Yeah, here we are…" I mumbled, not in the least bit happy to be back here.

**.o.O.o.**

"Clary, even _you _have to admit that the new soccer coach is hot."

Clary turned around to see Isabelle staring at a young guy in a 'Maple Ridge Varsity Soccer' t-shirt and running shorts. He had short brown hair and big blue eyes with long eyelashes. He was laughing with Coach Reynolds and Coach Phillips near the front of the gym. Clary stopped staring at the coaches and turned her gaze back to Isabelle.

"I guess he's kinda hot, yeah…" Clary laughed, but it was kinda awkward considering she and Izzy were both 15 and that guy was at least 25 or maybe 30.

"Oh come on, Clare. You know those sideburns totally turn you on." Isabelle wiggled her eyes suggestively. Clary giggled again, about to reply when a whistle blow cut her off. Glancing back to the group of coaches, she saw Coach Reynolds with the whistle in his mouth, motioning for all the students to sit down and get ready for warm ups. With a silent groan, she walked away from Izzy and back to her seat on the gym floor.

"Brad Clark?" _Here. "_Danielle Collins?" _Here. _"Meliorn Fallon?" _Here. _

I zoned out until he called my name.

"_Clarissa Morgenstern?" _

She raised her hand. "Here, and I go by Clary."

Coach R glanced at her, scribbled on his clipboard, and went to the next row of students. He went on to call the rest of the class' names and walked over and talked to the coaches again. The three of them were muttering, but she was too far away to hear what they were saying. They looked around, and then Coach Reynolds walked over to the class sitting on the floor next to them.

"Alright, class. Coach Franklin is out today with some…er…health problems… so you'll be joining my class for today's period." The juniors in the class mumbled their various 'okays' and 'ughs', shooting glances over at our sophomore class. Clary suppressed a groan- she didn't like the idea of spending her class period with a bunch of arrogant juniors. Coach Phillips' voice broke her from her thoughts.

Isabelle scooted closer to her. "I hear Franklin's got a hemorrhoid. Must suck, but that mean old asshole deserved it."

Before I could answer, she went back to her spot on the floor. I rolled my eyes and turned back around.

"Time to stretch! Touch your toes…" I stuck my feet out in front of me, grabbing my toes. I did this as he yelled out more and more stupid stretches, along with all the other classes in the gym.

After running for 3 minutes around the gym, the class met back up in the middle of the gym. Clary glanced around, looking for Isabelle. She was talking to a guy from the junior class with dark hair, fair skin, and striking blue eyes. Clary immediately recognized Alec, Izzy's brother. A group of junior guys were around them, caught up in their own little conversations. _Alec's friends, _she thought.

"Morgenstern! Come help Meliorn set up the net." I rolled my eyes- first day of sophomore year and the gym coach was already calling her by her last name. Great. Glancing around, she saw Meliorn standing next to the volleyball net, which was currently in a pile on the floor. He looked up at her and grinned.

"Hey Clary- how was your summer?" He said, still with that stupid grin on his face. He'd made it pretty clear last year that he liked her, a lot. She took in his appearance. He had changed a little over the summer, although he still looked pretty much the same. He had the same pale complexion, light blonde side-swept hair, and sparkling green eyes. Definitely not ugly, but he still gave me the creeps sometimes.

"Hey, Meliorn! It was fun! Yours?" she asked, trying to be polite.

"It was great- I missed school though. Come on, we'd better set this up." He leaned over, picked up the net, and handed it to her. She walked over to the other pole and hooked up the net, securing it with a knot. She went back over where Meliorn had just finished tying his end, and was now talking to Coach.

"Good job, Morgenstern. We'll be playing 6 on 6, games to 15. We'll try and evenly divide the sophomores and juniors, okay?" She and Meliorn just nodded.

_Shit. Volleyball with a bunch of juniors? No thanks. _

As if reading her mind, Isabelle walked over. "Can we not play with them?" She asked, tilting her head towards the pack of upperclassmen.

"Seriously. But, hey, why don't you wanna play with Alec? I'm sure he and his friends can't be _that _good, right?" I asked, still watching the juniors.

"You'd be surprised- he knows most of them from the soccer team, so they're all pretty athletic. And hot." She added, with a sly glance at me.

I recognized a few of the guys- one with inky black hair, who I knew was also friends with my brother, named Sebastian Verlac. I'd known him since I was in middle school, and he was pretty cool. I also recognized the tall, golden haired guy standing next to them with a smirk on his face. Jace Wayland. It would be hard not to know who he was, at our school at least. He had pale gold skin, golden curly hair, and bright gold eyes. His angular face was, well, beautiful. And that smirk- Jesus Clary, control yourself. On the few occasions she'd talked to Jace, or been in a conversation with him, he'd been a colossal ass. He was a total jerk, and was definitely known for getting all the girls.

"Mhmm…" was the only answer I could get out.

After we were finally put on teams, we took our places on the court. My heart sunk when I looked around and saw my team. I was front left, front left was some skinny junior girl I didn't know, front right was Alec Lightwood, back right was Isabelle, and back middle was Meliorn. And, of course, back left was Jace Wayland. He had tossed the ball up and was getting ready to serve. I turned back to face the net. I heard him hit the ball and watched it go to the other court. The ball went flying in between Danielle and Sebastian Verlac. She screamed and ran off, obviously scared of a ball. Sebastian cursed as the ball fell to the ground.

Jace smirked as the ball rolled back under to our side of the net. He tossed it easily into the air again, lifting his arm up and swinging. The ball went over the net again, but this time one of the other juniors passed it. Brad, one of the sophomores in my class, set it up really high. Sebastian jumped up and spiked it down, right in front of Izzy. His team cheered as a guy on their team jogged back to serve. He tossed it up, but he didn't hit it very hard and it hit the net. Cursing, he rolled it back under the net towards us.

Since we were rotating, it was my turn to serve. I leaned over to grab the ball, but someone else was already holding it. I looked up to see Jace crouched next to me, grabbing the ball. He gave me his signature smirk and tried to pull it away, but my grip was too strong.

"Come on, Red. Everybody knows juniors are better at sports than sophomores anyways. Let me serve."

Clary glared back at him. "Actually, I can serve perfectly fine, and it's my turn, so if you wouldn't mind letting go that'd be great."

His brows furrowed and he pulled on it harder. I still wouldn't give it to him, though. At this point, all the students on the court were watching. After all, most girls would've just swooned and given Jace the ball. They were all curious as to why Clary, a complete loser, was talking to the school's very own golden boy.

"Give me the ball!" he said, obviously getting irritated.

"Hm… lemme think about that. No."

"Give it here, Morgenstern." He said, glaring back at me.

"No, asshole, it's my serve." His eyebrows shot up at that, and I yanked on the ball again.

He looked at me again, about to say something when the coach shouted at them.

"WAYLAND! It's Morgenstern's serve, back off." Coach Reynolds went back to his chat with the coaches after saying it, though.

He handed it over, looking pissed as hell.

"Thanks, asshole." I muttered, just so he could hear. Before letting go of it completely, he leaned back and whispered in my ear.

"Feisty? I like feisty."

His breath tickled my ear. I glanced up to see him seductively smirking. He finally let go, so I rolled my eyes and walked behind the baseline. I tossed it up in the air, hit it, and watched it go sailing over. It went right past Sebastian, who was too busy laughing and looking at Jace through the net to hit it. It hit the floor. I gave my own little smirk to the two of them and served again.

**.o.O.o.**

We ended up winning the game and sat watching the rest of our class play until the period ended. On the way back to the locker rooms, Izzy grabbed my shoulder.

Rather forcefully, I might add.

"Jeez Izzy, what do you want?" I rubbed my shoulder, wincing.

"Man up, Clare. Now spill." Izzy stared at me expectantly.

"About what? There's nothing to spill, Iz."

We finally got to the locker room when Isabelle practically screamed at me.

"NOTHING TO SPILL? So your conversation back there with the Golden Boy was nothing? What, were you guys talking about the weather? Ha. No. SO SPILL! I want details, Morgenstern."

I sighed, and recalled in exact detail the conversation between me and Jace. For some reason, though, I left out what he whispered in my ear.

Izzy was looking at me, mouth hanging open. "_YOU _called _Jace Wayland_ an asshole? Twice!? Jesus Christ Clary."

"It was really no big deal. He was being a colossal ass, so I told him. Simple."

She laughed, but continued to give me that weird look. I finished changing, putting on a green cami with a black and white plaid flannel. I left the top few buttons open, pulled on a pair of skinnies, and laced up my black hi-top Converse. I grabbed my backpack, which was just plain black, and walked out of the locker room to my 2nd period. Ugh, I had Pre-Calculus. Boring.

** .o.O.o.**

I barely made it through math without falling asleep when the bell rang. Grabbing my things, I walked out into the crowded hallways. I pulled my schedule out of my backpack and saw my 3rd period- Art. Yay! I was about to walk into Ms. Fairchild's classroom when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I spun around to see my older brother, Jonathon, standing behind me. His white-blonde hair was swept to the side, as always, and he had that stupid grin on his face.

"Hey Clare Bear, how's your first day going?"

"Gym was okay, it kinda sucked, but hey, it's gym class so what do you expect? Math was so boring I almost dozed off."

Jonathon started laughing and then raised an eyebrow quizzically.

"Gym was _okay_? I think it was more than okay. Rumor has it that Jace Wayland was being an asshole, and then you called him an asshole! Really, sis, I can't believe you didn't tell me sooner. That's hysterical! I didn't think you had it in you, to be honest."

Jonathon laughed again, his face turning a little red.

"Yeah, yeah I know, I'm hilarious. How'd you find out anyways?" I asked, trying to keep my tone neutral and sarcastic.

"Well, Seb and Jace are in my History class 2nd period, so they told me then. Still can't believe you called him out sissy" He said, again. Okay his enthusiasm was starting to get annoying.

"I didn't know you were friends with Jace Wayland?" I said, cocking an eyebrow at him.

Jonathon glanced at me, his expression unreadable for a minute, but it went away and the laughter reappeared.

"Oh, really? Well he's on the team with me and we've had classes together since freshman year, so yeah, we talk sometimes. He and Seb are coming over after school by the way to do a history project. They'll be riding home with us in my car."

I groaned, but laughed a little.

"See ya later, Jon, I'm gonna be late for art."

….

Art was really cool, I loved my teacher, Ms. Fairchild. In a way, she kind of reminded me of my mom. The same curly hair, although my teacher's was a little darker, the same big smile, them both being artists. Her eyes were a similar color, though my mom's were a bit brighter green.

My mom used to love to say that the eyes were the window to the soul. I like to think that she was right, but I'm not so sure. I wonder, what do people see when they look at me? Do they see the loneliness, the sadness that I've been hiding? Or do they see happy, normal, nerdy Clary Morgenstern, without a care in the world?

The shouts of the people in the hallway broke me from my thoughts. I glanced down at my schedule, looking for my 4th class.

Off to Chorus!

I wasn't really anticipating this class, because although I loved to sing in my free time, I'd never sung in front of people before. It was a long walk to the other side of the school, so I slipped in my earbuds and put my playlist on shuffle.

When I walked into the chorus room, I looked around, didn't see Izzy, Jon, so I took a seat near the back of the room. I was turning off my music when a voice next to me made me jump.

"Hey, Red."

I looked over to see who had said that, but I kind of already knew. I hoped I was wrong, but I wasn't. A pair of golden eyes were looking at me, gleaming.

"Hey, asshole."

** .o.O.o.**

_**Hey everyone!**_

_**So I have some really good ideas for this story, but I'm not sure if I'll continue, if nobody's reading it. So please, REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!**_

_**I know Clary may seem a bit bipolar, sad and then fine, but you'll see her character develop throughout the story. Jace may seem like a douche, but that's simply because Jace is sometimes a huge douche. It'll get better, you'll see :) **_

_**And yes, this IS mainly a Clace fic, although I'll have some Jaia, Sizzy, Malec, and more thrown in. NO, you haven't met all the characters yet. You've probably met like half of them, at most.**_

_**And yes, this will be as least cliché as I can make it. It will not be like every other TMI high school fic, this one will be unique. With the chorus class & Clary's love for music, I will definitely incorporate a lot of songs and such into the story. Hence the title, "Fix You" (if you don't know, it's a Coldplay song, and it's perfect) It'll be great, I promise.**_

_**Pinky Promise!**_

_**As for updating, I'll try and update it about once a week, but it might change to every 2 weeks, depending on how busy I am with school. I'll still be updating Taken as well, but this one will be 10x better and probably a lot longer. I'll wrap up Taken at around chapter 20 or so, not completely sure yet. **_

_**And again, I will not continue this if nobody's reading it, so follow, favorite, & review review review!**_

_**Thank you lovelies!**_

_**xoxo**_

_**~alwaysabooknerd**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Here's chapter 2! I really love hearing what you all have to say about my stories, the reviews on the last chapter were so sweet 3 thank y'all!**_

_**So what do you guys think about me including "Chapter Songs" for each chapter? I'll do it for the next few, if you guys want me to **_

_**To clarify:**_

_**-Clary and Isabelle are 15, they'll turn 16 this year. I meant to type 15, not 16.**_

_**-Yes, I know Meliorn in the books had dark hair, but he's blonde now *snap snap***_

_**-I'm sorry for typos and such. I try to be careful but I don't have a beta so there will be occasional typos. **_

_**Rated T for cursing & some sensitive content**_

_**Disclaimer- I do not own the Mortal Instruments series or its characters.**_

_**Enjoy Chapter 2! **_

**.o.O.o.**

"_Hey, Red."_

_I looked over to see who had said that, but I kind of already knew. I hoped I was wrong, but I wasn't. A pair of golden eyes was looking at me, gleaming. _

"_Hey, asshole."_

…

Clary's POV

Really? This douche had to be in one of my classes?

Oh, shit. It's chorus. He gets to hear me sing. Come on, karma. I'm perfectly lovable. What the hell did I do to deserve this?

Jace laughed, and grinned at me. "You're Jonathan's little sister, right?"

"Yeah, that's me."

"Hmm…" Jace looked up with a finger tapping on his chin, like he was thinking or something. It was fairly aggravating.

"What?" I asked, staring at him.

He glanced back down and grinned, again. "He never mentioned sister was hot, that's all."

I tried to fight the blush that was rising to my cheeks, but failed.

"No feisty comment, Red? What a shame. I like feisty, you know." He smirked.

Damn, that stupid smirk.

Stop it Clary. Now.

"Actually, asshole, I-"

Before I could finish, the teacher walked in. It was a guy, probably in his 30's or 40's. He had brown hair, a beard, and glasses covering his blue eyes.

"Hello, class. I'm Mr. Graymark, your chorus teacher for the year. I think people do their best work in groups, so we'll be doing a lot of partner work this year. You will have the same partner for most of the semester. Today's assignment will be to help you get to know your partner better, alright?"

A chorus of mutters and grumbles broke out throughout the class.

Maia, a junior girl with caramel colored skin and dark curly hair raised her hand.

"Do we get to choose our partners, or are they assigned?"

"I've already assigned them for you."

Maia huffed and sat down, shooting an annoyed glance at her boyfriend, Jordan Kyle. I'd hung out with Maia before, considering Jordan was pretty close with Sebastian and Jonathan.

"Kaelie Fey, you and Aline Penhallow will be partners." A blonde girl squealed and hugged the dark haired girl next to her.

"Jordan Kyle, you and Raphael Santiago will work together." Maia's boyfriend turned and looked at Raphael. Both boys groaned and looked away.

"Maia Roberts, you'll be working with Andrew Collins." A boy with dirty blonde hair and bright green eyes gave Maia a little half wave. I tried not to giggle when Jordan narrowed his eyes at the two.

I zoned out for the rest of the pairs, until our teacher said my name. Crap- I swear if I'm stuck with Meliorn or some shit I'm dropping the class.

"Clarissa Morgenstern, you'll work with…Jace Wayland."

My heart sunk.

I saw Aline and Kaelie glaring at me from where they sat. Jealous much, bitches? I met their gaze until they looked away, grumbling with each other about something.

Jace smirked at me and I shook my head.

"Okay class, so today will be about getting to know your partner. You may have to spend some time outside of class, as well."

As if this class wasn't bad enough.

Maia, being her usual self, raised her hand and asked, "Excuse me but isn't this a chorus class? Why do we have a partner? Why do I gotta spend time outside of school with someone just to sing?" She rolled her eyes.

As much as I agreed with her, I'm pretty sure that was not the way to go about this.

"Well, Mrs. Roberts, I think music is about more than just singing notes and reading words off of a page. It's about expressing yourself, and your feelings through more than just your words. Your partner will be there to listen to and help you turn your emotions and thoughts into music. They'll also help with technique when you sing, of course."

Maia huffed and sat back down, muttering something to Jordan. Her boyfriend laughed a little and kissed her forehead.

Damn they're adorable.

"Today's assignment is to choose a song and prepare a cover of it. Choose something that means something to you personally. Your partner should help with your song choice and give you tips on your voice, okay? You can work in here or go out to the courtyard to practice."

"Come on, Red, let's work in the courtyard." I looked up to see Jace standing next to me, holding his hand out for me to take. Groaning, I get up- and no, I don't take his hand. Who knows where that thing's been.

We get out to the courtyard and sit at one of the old wooden benches. Looking around, it seems like most of our class stayed inside to work on their projects. It was pretty nice outside, though. It was quiet and fairly warm with a slight breeze.

Jace's hand waving in front of my face snapped me from my thoughts.

"Earth to Clary." He didn't call me 'Red'. That's a first.

"Huh?"

"I asked if you knew what song you're singing." He gave me his famous smirk.

"Um…no, I don't. Do you?"

He tapped his finger to his chin, like he had earlier, and then pointed up to the sky.

"I've got it!" He cleared his throat, then started singing.

"_When I walk in the spot, yeah, this is what I see._

_Everybody stops and they staring at me._

_I got passion in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it,_

_show it, show it, show it._

_I'm sexy and I know it._

_I'm sexy and I know it."_

I burst out laughing as he wiggled his eyebrows at me suggestively. I finally recovered, and rolled my eyes at him.

"You know, it's supposed to be like deep or personal or shit."

"That was personal, if you ask me."

"Nope, doesn't count."

He sighed. "Well, then I don't know what I'll sing, Red. You still have to pick a song, too."

"Well I don't know either, asshole. I'm not a fan of singing in front of people either, so I don't even know what to sing about."

"Asshole? Not very endearing… I think I deserve a better nickname, Red."

"Maybe if you stop being an asshole, you'll get one." I flash him a grin.

He laughs. Damn, even his laugh is hot.

Control yourself, Clary!

"Well, Red, I'll have to work on that."

I knew he wouldn't, but I nodded and smirked anyway. "So, for the assignment, what are you gonna sing about? Something deep or personal, remember."

"I don't know. I suppose he expects us to sing about the shit in our life, huh?"

"Ha, if only you knew, asshole."

"Oh, I want to know, Red. What kind of shit goes on in the life of my feisty little redhead?"

I didn't answer him right away. There was too much shit, really, but I didn't want to spill to the school's biggest asshole. Not that he'd care anyways.

"Red?"

"My mom's dead and my dad's an ass." _Did I really just tell him that?_

"Oh."

"What about your shit, asshole?" I asked, feeling uncomfortable.

"Abandoned and adopted. A&A, if you will." He smirked, but his eyes were dark. I could tell he didn't like to talk about it, so I didn't press.

We sit in silence, both scrolling through our music on our phones looking for a song.

"Have you picked yours yet?" he asked, breaking the silence.

"Yeah, I think so. Have you?"

"No, not yet. Sing yours?"

I glared at him. "Do I have to?"

"Yes, Red, I think you do."

I continued to glare at him for a minute and then cleared my throat. I look out at the trees in the courtyard, surrounded by flowers all swaying in the wind. It was beautiful out here; it felt peaceful. So I started singing. For Jace Wayland. I have to say, I never thought this would happen. My voice came out soft, but even, and I continued to stare out at the courtyard as I sang.

"_Step one, you say 'we need to talk'._

_He walks, you say, 'Sit down. It's just a talk.'_

_He smiles politely back at you._

_You stare politely right on through_

_Some sort of window to your right_

_As he goes left and you stay right_

_Between the lines of fear and blame_

_You begin to wonder why you came._

_Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend_

_Somewhere along in the bitterness_

_And I would have stayed up with you all night_

_Had I known _

_How to save a life._

I paused for a moment.

_Let him know that you know best,_

'_Cause after all you do know best._

_Try to slip past his defense_

_Without granting innocence_

_Lay down a list of what is wrong_

_The things you've told him all along_

_Pray to God, he hears you_

_And I pray to God, he hears you_

_And where did I go wrong? I lost a friend_

_Somewhere along in the bitterness_

_And I would have stayed up with you all night _

_Had I known how to save a life_

_As he begins to raise his voice_

_You lower yours and grant him one last choice_

_Drive until you lose the road_

_Or break with the ones you've followed_

_He will do one of two things_

_He will admit to everything _

_Or he'll say he's just not the same_

_And you'll begin to wonder why you came_

_Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend_

_Somewhere along in the bitterness_

_And I would have stayed up with you all night_

_Had I known _

_How to save a life.**_

I didn't finish the song, but I'm sure you get the point.

Jace was silent for a minute, staring at me.

"What's wrong?" I asked him, shifting uncomfortably under his gaze.

"Who was that song about?" he asked quietly.

"Two people, really… Mostly my mom."

_***Flashback***_

"_**Honey, I'm home! Can I talk to you for a minute?" **_

_**The woman with dark red hair and big green eyes walked through the door and into the kitchen, looking for her husband. She froze in her tracks when he came in the room, reeking of alcohol and holding a bottle of beer. His ivory hair was matted and dirty and his dark eyes were narrowed as he glared at her.**_

"_**Jocelyn, where have you been? Fraternizing with that 'friend' of yours? Do you really think I'm stupid, bitch?"**_

"_**Damnit Valentine, I was at an art show! I told you. And I don't know what you're talking about. Luke is just a friend. If you'd put down that liquor for one second you'd realize it, too!" the woman screamed.**_

_**The man froze, then brought his hand across the woman's face, hard.**_

"_**Lying whore!" he yelled, staring at the woman. She stood with her hand on her cheek, looking at him with an expression of shock and anger.**_

_**Clary sniffed, terrified of what was happening, and too scared to come out from behind the couch. She felt a hand on her arm and turned to see Jonathon. **_

"_**Clare, we should go to my room or something. We shouldn't watch this."**_

_**Clary just shook her head and turned back to her arguing parents. Dad had never hit her mother before. She wanted her mother to tell her it would be okay. **_

"_**Valentine, the children. They can't hear this!"**_

"_**Too late, whore."**_

_**Jocelyn turned around and saw Clary and Jon's heads sticking out from behind the couch and stiffened.**_

"_**Clare, Jon, go to your rooms, please?" There was a note of begging in her voice. As she and her brother got up, Clary felt her arm being pulled back. She looked behind her and saw her father with his arm clamped around her elbow, yanking it towards him. She grabbed Jon's shirt as she was pulled back, and he came with her.**_

"_**Val, what are you doing?"**_

"_**Shut up! They deserve to know what a bitch their mother really is" he slurred, tightening his grip on Clary. She let out a little cry of pain, only to earn a slap herself. She didn't make another noise as she rubbed at her face. Jon stared at her in horror, mouthing 'are you okay'. She nodded ever so slightly and looked at her mother.**_

"_**Stop it! Don't hurt the kids, please, Valentine." Unshed tears made her eyes shine as she stared at her husband, begging him to let the kids go.**_

_**Valentine looked at the children he was holding and released them. Both kids backed away, standing behind their mother. **_

"_**Clare, lemme see it. Are you ok?" Jon whispered, putting his hand on her face and inspecting where their father had hit her.**_

"_**I'm fine, Jon." Clary answered, not moving her gaze from her parents.**_

_**Valentine raised his hand to slap Jocelyn again, but this time Clary jumped out and hit it away, then kicked him in the crotch.**_

_**Probably not the best move, but she couldn't let him hit her mommy, could she? No.**_

"_**Clary, honey, don't do that." Her mother whispered. **_

"_**You little bitch!" yelled Valentine, swinging out a hand to slap Clary but Jocelyn stopped him.**_

"_**Don't hurt my daughter." She said, staring at him for a minute before grabbing Clary and Jon and running outside, to the car. **_

_**It was winter, and it was starting to snow outside. Clary huddled with Jon in the backseat, while their mother drove quietly, not speaking to them. **_

_**Clary felt the car slide on the icy road. Her mother tried to control it, but the car veered off the road, into a guardrail and down a hill into a small group of trees. Clary heard the screech of the tires. She saw the trees and grass flying towards them as they hurtled down the hill. She felt the jerk of the car as it landed on its side. She heard her mother's scream.**_

_**Clary felt a shooting pain in her arm and one in her head. She felt blood trickling down her face. Her brother had a nasty gash on his arm and small cuts on his face. "Clare, you-you okay?" he asked.**_

"_**I'm fine."**_

"_**Mom? Are you hurt?" Clary climbed into the driver's seat, where the airbag had gone off, where Jocelyn lay unmoving. She had cuts on her face and neck, and blood was pooling from her chest, soaking her shirt. A small trickle of blood flowed from her mouth.**_

"_**Mom!? Mommy? Mom!?"**_

_**Clary heard the sirens coming, she saw the police and paramedics, she saw the flashing lights. She wouldn't let go of her mom's hand.**_

_**Her head really hurt and her vision was going black around the edges. But she couldn't let go. **_

"_**Mommy? You'll be okay. The police are here now. **_

"_**Clary?" Was that Jon? It didn't sound like him.**_

"_**Clary?" The voice asked again. It definitely wasn't Jon.**_

"Clary? You okay?"

Clary looked up and remembered where she was. Jace still sat next to her, but his hand was on her shoulder.

"Are you- Are you crying?"

Shit. I probably look like the biggest loser, sitting next to Jace Wayland and crying.

I wiped my cheeks and put on the best indignant expression I could muster.

"What? No I'm fine."

Jace didn't look like he believed me.

"Who else?" he asked.

"Who else? What do you mean?"

"You said you sung that song about two people. Who was the other?"

"My best friend. He died last year."

"I'm sorry." He glanced at me, his golden eyes looking sincered.

"Why are you apologizing?"

"I feel bad for what you went through."

"I don't get why people apologize for things they didn't do." I said, staring up at the sky.

"I'm not sorry, then. It sucks though."

"That's life for you." I smirked at him, and he laughed.

**.o.O.o.**

The next period was English 10 (Honors). I looked at the teacher, and my heart sank. It was Ms. Lewis, Simon's mom. I hadn't spoken to her since the funeral, and wasn't looking forward to it. Being around his family would bring back too many painful memories and I don't think I'm ready for that. It's August and it happened last October.

When I walked in the room, I realized I was only like the third person there. Great. Ms. Lewis looked up when I entered and I saw her eyes widen. She gave me a small smile and a wave to come over to her desk. I obliged, the pain in my chest growing when I saw the framed picture of Simon on her desk.

"Hi, Ms. Lewis. How are you?"

"I'm…getting better, Clary. Are you doing alright?"

"As good as I'll ever be." I shrugged, not meeting her gaze. "Where should I sit?" I asked, not wanting to talk about him anymore.

"Wherever you'd like, sweetie." She was staring at me with sad eyes. I avoided any more conversation and sat down near the back of the room.

**.o.O.o.**

The rest of the periods passed by pretty quickly. I sat with Izzy at lunch, and surprisingly Jonathan, Alec, Sebastian, Jordan, and Maia joined us. It was nice to be around people again, after such a lonely summer. History was boring, Chemistry was boring, but I really like Drawing. They offer like ten different art classes, so I was taking both Art 2 and Drawing honors.

I spent the period just sketching whatever came to mind. I like Mrs. Fairchild a lot, and she was fine with us drawing whatever. I mostly drew Simon, Mom, and even Jon. I drew one picture I really loved, of me, Jon, Sebastian, Jordan, Maia, Alec, Izzy, and Jace. I don't know why I drew us all together, when we're not even that close, but I did. I drew Jordan's arm around Maia's shoulders, Izzy laughing, Seb and Jon grinning, Alec shyly peeking out in the back, and Jace with his signature smirk.

After drawing was over, it was finally time to go home. I walked over to the junior parking lot and looked around for my brother. I saw him talking to Sebastian next to his car. When he saw me, he grinned and I walked over there.

"Hey Clare. How was your day?" He asked, pulling me in for a hug.

"It was great. And yours?"

"Schooly."

"Ah."

"Hey, Clary" Sebastian grinned at me and gave me a hug, lingering a little longer than normal. That's weird.

"Hey, Seb." I smiled at him as Jace approached.

He did that guy half hug thing with Jon and Seb and smirked at me "Red."

"Asshole."

Jon burst out laughing as we climbed in the car. I was sitting next to Jace, with Jon driving and Seb riding shotgun.

"Red, we still have to work on that assignment tonight."

"I know."

Jace smirked at me and went back to his phone.

Well, this should be fun.

_**A/N**_

_**I know I know, you probably hate me. Simon! I hated doing it, really, but it was necessary for the story okay.**_

_***hides in corner***_

_****I DO NOT OWN THE LYRICS TO 'HOW TO SAVE A LIFE'. IT IS A BEAUTIFUL SONG BY THE FRAY AND YOU SHOULD ALL LISTEN TO IT. NO COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT INTENDED****_

_**-Little bit of clace there, huh?**_

_**-Now you know more about their pasts! What do ya think?**_

_**-Simon o.o Don't kill me. How do you think he died?**_

_**-Chapter songs? Yes or no?**_

_**-Read & Review!**_

_**~alwaysabooknerd**_


	3. Chapter 3

**Fix You- Chapter 3**

_**Here you guys go! Chapter 3! I don't have school today, because it snowed yesterday and the day before, so I might be able to update Taken as well. **_

_**Your reviews are so sweet! I love reading them! I will be doing chapter songs, thanks for the input(:**_

_**Enjoy~**_

_Chapter Songs:_

_Linkin Park- Numb (Acoustic Version) _{Jace}

**I do not own the lyrics to this song

_Train- Drops of Jupiter _(song Clary's listening to)

**I do not own these lyrics

_Slipped Away- Avril Lavigne _{Clary}

**x.x.x.x**

**Clary's POV**

The ride home was fairly uneventful- the boys just talked about soccer and the "hot chics" at our school. I blocked out their conversations because, really, who wants to hear them talking about Seelie's ass? Not me. Instead, I just stared out the window, watching the houses and trees and people all pass by. It was quite peaceful, until a voice broke me out of my thoughts.

"That okay with you, Red?"

"What?" Whoops. I guess I missed something. Jace smirked at me before answering my question. I scowled, but tried to push away the blush his smirk caused.

"I'll work with you on the chorus project first and then I'll help Jon and Seb with our history thing."

"Oh yeah. Sure."

Instead of making some assy comment, he just nodded and went back to talking to Jon and Sebastian.

When we got home, I went inside and got a glass of water and some M&M's because chocolate's delicious, duh.

I walked into the living room and plopped down on the couch next to my backpack. Sighing, I pulled out my sketchbook. My art homework was to draw something you loved, but I don't really have much of that. Looking around the room, I saw a few beer cans on the ground. I picked them up quickly- for some reason I don't want Jace or Sebastian to see my dad's problem. I don't know why, I'm sure Jon's told at least Seb. Isabelle knows that he drinks a lot, but she doesn't know a lot. Jon and Seb are closer than me and Izzy, though.

Simon was the only person I was ever really close to. I told him all about my dad, he helped me through mom's death, and he was there for me when no one else was. I still haven't really gotten over his death, not really. It all just happened so quick, out of nowhere. I wish I'd been there to help him, but I wasn't.

"Ready to sing, Red?"

I turned around and saw Jace standing behind me with a grin on his face.

"Sure, do you wanna work in here or somewhere else?"

"It's nice outside." He turned around and walked out. I guess that answers my question. I grabbed my backpack and followed Jace outside, letting him lead us to the gazebo. Looking around, I realize how pretty our backyard is. Small wooden steps lead from the back porch door to the stone patio. A little gazebo sits a few yards away, with tiny lights in it and a couple big chairs. Jace and I walk over and sit down across from each other.

"Have you chosen your song yet?" I ask him. I'm curious to see what he picked- I judge you based on your music taste. And as irritating as he is, I'm still really curious about why Jace thinks his life is so shitty. He's probably the most popular, and definitely most attractive, guy at our school. He's amazing at soccer, he could get any girl, and I think he's pretty intelligent too. Well, at least mildly intelligent.

"I don't know. Are you still singing the one you picked earlier?" he looked over at me curiously.

"I think so." I respond, not sure if I want to open that part of me up to anyone, especially not my chorus class. I still can't believe I sang for Jace earlier, if I'm being honest.

I'm not good with people and sharing my feelings and shit. I used to be able to, with Simon. After my mom died, I was so sad, so broken. I talked to him, and he helped fix me. I was a mess after the accident. But after Simon's death, I wasn't as sad, on the outside at least. I just shut myself away, not letting anyone in. If my mom's death broke me, then Simon's death just swept all the pieces under a rug and left me alone. I think some people may think I didn't care, or didn't grieve for Simon. I did, I cried all day after it happened. But after that, I put on a brave face. I only really let out my emotions in my art anymore.

I took Chorus because music had been an outlet, too, recently. I thought maybe singing could help, that music might be a sort of release. But singing songs that reminded me of him or my mom just brought back too many painful memories.

I looked back at Jace, trying to push thoughts of Simon away.

"What song are you thinking of singing?"

He looked away from me, staring at something in the distance. Damn it, was this about to get all soppy and dramatic? I was about to ask him again when he finally answered.

"I don't know, Red. Deep stuff isn't really my thing, I have a few ideas but I don't think I'd actually sing them in front of our class. Hell, I don't think I want to sing _anything _for that damn class."

I laughed a little at that, but it was pretty humorless.

"Well, the teacher specifically said for it to be a personal song. What's something deep, asshole?"

Jace smirked at me and laughed a little. "I've really got to do something about that nickname, Red."

"Really? I think it's rather fitting. You're avoiding my question though."

Jace sighed and turned his face back up to face the sky, like he was thinking. "Well, I don't have much to sing about. My life's shitty and boring."

"My life is shitty and boring, asshole. I found a song. Anyways, what shit are you thinking of? You don't seem that bad off, you know. You're the school's star soccer player, you've dated half the girls in your class and could probably get anyone you wanted, and everyone at school seems to love you."

"Well, it's not the people at school that are the problem, Red."

I was conflicted at this. He didn't seem to want to indulge in me anymore, but I wanted to know more and couldn't really help him pick a song.

"Home, then?"

"If you could call it that, then yes. I told you earlier Red, I was abandoned and adopted. My life sucked until I moved in with my adoptive father, who turned out to be a controlling asshole."

I just nodded, not wanting to press on the subject of his early life, or frankly his life at all. Part of me wondered if his dad was like mine, but I didn't ask. We weren't even friends, really. The bitterness in his tone as he spat out 'abandoned' was enough to keep my curiosity at bay. Surprisingly, he continued telling me stuff. I'm sure why, but I'm not complaining.

"My mom died when I was a kid. My dad decided I was too much of a burden so he dropped me off at an adoption center."

Jace sounded so angry, so bitter about his dad that I felt myself tear up a little. I quickly pushed away the tears- Jace Wayland sure as hell didn't deserve my pity or sadness.

"How old were you?" I don't know why I asked, seeing as how pissed he looked, but I did.

He glanced at me, and then answered. "I was 9."

I swallowed and nodded. I didn't ask anything else about his parents- he obviously didn't want to talk about it.

"Well, I would tell you what song to sing, but I have no ideas."

Jace just nodded. He looked at his phone, searching for a song again I assume, before picking one.

"I guess this will work."

"Sing?" I asked, not sure of what to expect. He nodded, leaning back into his chair and getting comfortable.

"_I'm tired of being what you want me to be, _

_Feeling so faithless, lost under the surface._

_I don't what you're expecting of me. _

_Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes._

_Every step that I take is another mistake to you_

_I've become so numb I can't feel you there_

_I've become so tired, so much more aware_

_I'm becoming this, _

_All I want to do is be more like me,_

_And be less like you."_

I stared at Jace as he sung. His lips stayed slightly parted as he was singing, the light from outside making his golden curls shine. His skin was a beautiful pale gold color- he was beautiful, really. As he sang, even though the song was bitter and angry and upset, Jace looked peaceful. His eyes stayed shut as he sang each word- and he had a beautiful voice.

"_Can't you see that you're smothering me?_

_Holding too tightly, afraid to lose control_

'_Cause everything that you thought I would be_

_Is falling apart, right in front of you_

_Every step that I take is another mistake to you_

_And every step that I take is more than I can take,_

_I've become so numb I can't feel you there_

_I've become so tired, so much more aware, _

_I'm becoming this,_

_All I want to do is be more like me_

_And be less like you_

_And I know, I may end up failing too_

_But I know, you were just like me with someone disappointed in you_

_I've become so numb _

_I can't feel you there _

_I've become so tired, so much more aware_

_I'm becoming this _

_All I want to do is be more like me, and be less like you."_

As the last note hung in the air, Jace kept his eyes closed, his head still staring up at the roof of the gazebo. I was quiet, too, not wanting to break his concentration. After a minute or so, Jace looked back down and glanced at me expectantly.

"Was that about your adopted father?" My voice was quiet, more so than I expected it to come out.

He nodded. "Was it okay?"

Is he really asking me for confirmation? What the hell?

"Yeah, it was great. You have a nice voice, asshole. Do you sing often or something?" I don't know why I asked. What did I expect? A secret pop star or some shit underneath that jock cover? Haha right, because that's likely.

He looked uncomfortable. "Yeah, I learned how to play the piano as a kid, and then the guitar when I got older. I play and sing sometimes. Music helps sometimes, you know?"

I nodded. Yeah, I did know. But I sure as hell wasn't gonna have some deep music discussion with Jace f*cking Wayland.

"I don't want to sing to a damn chorus class about my childhood issues, so I figured singing about my ass of a father would have to do. Like, he wants me to be what he wasn't. He thinks me being some soccer star and going to a good school and shit will make up for his dreams. He's living through me, and putting me through hell to do it."

I nodded again, staring back at him. He looked pretty angry talking about his father.

"You know, you're supposed to give me pointers on my voice and shit, Red."

"Well you might want to work on your pitch on the line 'Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes'. You seemed to get kinda low on that one and it's not supposed to be too much different than the rest."

"You know that song? I don't peg you for that kind of girl."

"What kind of girl is that?" I asked, curious.

"One with good music taste." I was insulted at this- my music taste was most definitely amazing and probably much better than his. Opinions my ass- there's good music, there's bad music, and there's shit that makes you want to burst your own eardrums with screwdrivers.

I gasped in fake hurt. "How dare you question my music taste, Wayland!?"

He chuckled at that.

**Jace's POV**

I laughed at her mock hurt, though I hadn't really doubted her. I didn't pay much attention to her at school, but every time I do remember seeing her, she had in her earbuds and was bobbing her head to the music. Someone that listens to music that much obviously had something good to listen to. But damn, her calling me by my last name was pretty hot.

"I don't know Red. Some people listen to shit, and if you were one of those people then I don't think that we could be friends."

"Oh really, asshole? Is that what we are- friends?" She laughed, throwing her head back. Does she not think we're friends? Damn, I was actually talking to a girl for once. I don't talk to girls- I keep trying to convince myself it's just because of the project, but there's a tiny part of me that thinks maybe I could actually have a friend in this feisty redhead.

"I thought you had to like someone to be their friend."

She giggled again, looking at me, but I'm pretty sure she's kidding. Hell, why do I even care? She's a girl- as much as I hate to admit it, girls have never been friends to me. I use them to satisfy my needs, and they get to flaunt me to their friends. That's how it's always been, and how it is now. Friends? My only friends are really the soccer guys.

"Oh, quite the contrary, Red. I'm 'friends' with a lot of people, but they still annoy the hell outta me sometimes."

"Do I annoy the hell out of you, asshole?"

"No, Red. I told you already, I like feisty." I smirked when she blushed.

"Well, asshole, maybe we can be friends." She grinned back at me and went back to staring up at the ceiling. Clarissa Morgenstern really is a piece of work. I grinned back and looked up too, enjoying the moment.

**x.x.x.x**

**Clary's POV **

After rehearsing our songs once or twice again, Jace went to Jonathan's room to work on his project with him and Seb. I stayed out on the gazebo, to work on my art homework. My sketchbook was sitting on my lap, but I didn't know what to draw. _"Something you love"_ is what Ms. Fairchild had said. I don't love anything, not really. I suppose I love Jonathan, but he's the only one really. He's all I have left. My dad's been less of someone good in my life and more of someone casting a dark shadow over it. He's an alcoholic, and he knows it, but Christ knows it would kill him to put down his beer.

Jonathan says it's his way of coping with Mom's death, but I don't see how that makes it okay. He's never home, and when he is he's either drunk or passed out or shut up in his study pretending we don't exist. I've always known he was bipolar or something, but his rage had been getting so much worst. He even hit me last week, in a drunken rage when I came back from Izzy's late and didn't get us any dinner. Jonathan had stopped him and given him food and had taken me away to nurse my wound. It was just a slap, nothing makeup couldn't cover up. Besides, it had been summer, and I didn't see anyone the next day.

Still, after my parents' marriage fell apart and ended with my mom's death and my neglecting, abusive father, I realized that love ends in tragedy. I loved Simon- not in a romantic way, but he was like a brother to me, and we were so much closer than Jon and I are.

Everyone I'd ever loved had left me, so I have nothing left, except Jon. I've been told I'm closed off, or I shut people out, but it's not because I don't like them. I just have no faith that letting people in would do me any good. I don't think getting close to people ever ends well, and I'd like to hold on to whatever shred of happiness I still have.

So, there's nothing I really love. My sketchbook page stayed blank in front of me. I started sketching a picture of Jonathan, but I couldn't get the features right. I ripped out my page and started a new drawing, this one of Simon. I drew his face, laughing like he always did, and then I drew a small heart next to him. Inside, I wrote the words I said at his funeral.

"To my dearest friend, the closest non-biological brother I could ever have, _Suspendisse in interitum eius. Paenitet, et te amo. Vale."_

It was Latin- we'd taken a Latin class together, as forced by his mother. It meant "Have fun in the afterlife. I'm sorry, and I love you. Goodbye." At the bottom of the heart, I wrote '9.16.12'. That's the date he died, the day my best friend was taken away from me forever. I felt a tear slide down my cheek and fall silently onto the page below. I put in my earbuds and put on a song, hoping the light and cheerful tone would cheer me up. I bobbed my head along to the music and sang along to my favorite verse.

"_Tell me, did you sail across the sun? Did you make it to the Milky Way, to see the lights all faded?_

_And that heaven is overrated. Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star?_

_One without a permanent scar? _

_And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there?"_

It reminded me of Simon, how he'd gone off looking for more. He'd left Earth in search of more. An afterlife, perhaps. But I don't believe in one, at least not anymore. It was too hard to see a heaven when you're living in hell. Maybe hell couldn't exist without heaven, but if there is a place without suffering, I haven't seen it. I kept singing along to each song that played from my phone, still looking up with my eyes closed. I felt tears slide down my face once or twice again, as most of the songs on this playlist reminded me of Simon.

I tried to push the images away, but they came back with a force, rushing into my mind and making me relive the moments I've so desperately tried to escape.

"_Clary? I need to get away. I can't stand my Dad any more. He was such an asshole yesterday, he beat my mom up real bad and he just up and left. She's staying with my aunt and Rebecca, but I said I'd stay with you. In reality I just need to get away- I bought a train ticket for the Southbound train. Maybe I'll go to North Carolina or some shit. I don't know, I'm just sick of it here. I'll be back in a few days okay?"_

"_What the hell do you mean Lewis? Where you go, I go. I'm coming okay? Are you at the train station? I can be there in 15."_

"_No way, Clare. I don't even know where I'm going, really."_

"_Si, are you okay? You sound funny. Stay there I'm coming."_

"_NO Clare, I need to go alone okay?"_

I remember arguing with him more, but eventually he won. I got the call from the police two days later, after Simon didn't return any of my calls.

"_Clarissa Morgenstern?"_

"_That's me. Why are you calling?"  
"Are you friends with a Mr. Simon Lewis?"_

"_Yes, he's my best friend. Is something wrong? Where is he?"_

"_I'm so sorry to tell you this, miss. He was found dead this morning."_

"_What?! No that can't be! What happened? H-how?"_

"_It looks like suicide, Miss Morgenstern. He left a note. We'll need to talk to you and ask a few questions, could you come to the NYPD station in an hour?"_

"_Y-Yes of course."_

"_Thank you, miss."_

The tears were really coming now, and I was singing the lyrics to another song again, but this time the words were interrupted by choked sobs.

I stopped singing, and just laid there, silently crying and staring at the ceiling.

I remembered the note he left. One line in particular never left my mind.

_I love you Clary, but I can't take this anymore. I'll miss you, lorem ipsum rufus._

The Latin meant "my favorite redhead". Him saying that in his letter made me use it in his eulogy, and in my drawing.

I opened my eyes and said the one line I repeat every day when I go to visit his grave.

"_Ego te requiro, in saecula saeculorum."_

I'll miss you forever.

And I will.

**x.x.x.x**

_**A/N- Hey guys! What did y'all think? I know this chapter was a little slow, it was mostly background info on the characters. I almost cried writing that Simon bit! It was pretty angsty, I know.**_

_***squeals* Jace angst is adorable 3**_

_**I know you hate me for killing Si, but it's necessary for the plot. It killed me to do it! **_

_**And as far as chapter songs go, I will definitely add more in next chapter- I couldn't choose any songs for this one! I have some ideas for the next chapters though, don't worry(: & song suggestions are greatly appreciated! **_

_**-Simon's suicide?**_

_**-Angsty Jace?**_

_**-Abusive father?**_

_**- Jace's childhood?**_

_**-Clary's sad :(**_

_**Review Review Review! **_

_**~alwaysabooknerd**_


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